Sure I had my doubts and, if you stop for a minute and give the situation a bit of thought, you would have your doubts, too. I mean, after all, how many times have you heard the expression “If it sounds too good to be true, it always is” … too good to be true that is. But I had made a commitment and I was going to see it through. Besides, I had also written about it a few times in this very blog and had taken money from a backer to help finance the crazy thing so no matter how you looked at it, I was stuck. But then, an incredible thing happened. It actually turned out to better than I had expected … not just good, but actually kinda great even. I speak here of the first ever Stumpy Darby Gold Prospecting Adventure which took place last week. You see, we found gold. Honestly, we did. Not at first of course. In fact, the first half day of work was pretty much a bust and let me tell you, this gold prospecting thing is not as easy as you might think. The five of us in the expedition worked awfully hard and didn’t have much to show for the effort the first half day. So we shut down the site and drove into a nearby town for lunch and a bit of a pow-wow about what our next move should be.
We found a McDonald’s in the small northern town, chowed down on the predictable grub and made a strategic decision. Stumpy Darby – the legendary Stumpy Darby, that is – who had some knowledge of this area from past trips here, brought up the story of a small river that used to run into the nearby lake but had been blocked over the years by sand from various storms. If we could find that spot where the river used to flow into the lake but had become blocked, and find the right kind of sand and gravel mix therein, we might have success. But it was farther north from where we had been working and we had already used up the best part of the day. Of course, you know what our decision was … we were going further north in search of that river! And we found it, and, more importantly, we found what we were really looking for. Gold!Okay … because we made a promise to one another to not disclose the location or make any additional references to any of this, I can say no more. I will say this though … as I type these words, I can look to my immediate left, just a few inches above the Q & W on the key board, and look at my own personal glass vial of gold that came from our efforts. Incredible isn’t it. Who would have thought it? And by the way, a vial has also been sent to our one and only cash sponsor … USGlass magazine.
I Really Have Solved It … The U.S. Postal problem to be specific. Indeed, as promised, I sent my findings and solution to the very intelligent and extremely talented Ellen Rogers, editor at USGlass magazine, and it is my understanding that my formal report has been published in the August issue of that magazine which I am further told will soon be in the hands of the magazine’s nearly 50,000 subscribers. But now, I need your help. To be more accurate here, our nation needs your help and here’s what you need to do. After you read the report, make a copy of it and immediately mail it to your senator, congressman and bookie, if you have one. I have found over the years that nobody disseminates information as quickly as bookies and don’t think they don’t care about things like this. They pay taxes, too, you know … well some taxes anyway. Okay, that’s your assignment. Go forth and follow-up! We need to get this thing moving and after you read my report, you will know exactly why!
The Next Thing … An alert reader of this column sent me the following information which he got off the inside of a Snapple bottle cap, so we know it is accurate. Snapple fact #938 – It cost the U.S. Mint two cents to produce and distribute a penny in 2012. Then he asked, “Mr. Hill, can you help fix this?”
The answer is “Of course.” I can help to fix this, but there are more pressing problems that must take priority and the loss ratio on the penny is actually much better than most other governmental activities so, while I can help, I think the penny thing can wait. But please keep drinking those Snapples. Not only will you continue to expand your base of knowledge, but I own stock in this company and therefore appreciate your support more than you might know. Have you tried the Snapple Diet Raspberry Tea as yet?
It’s Looking Better … As has been reported here previously, I spend a fair amount of time reading and attempting to analyze economic data as it pertains to the construction industry in the U.S. of A. I am actually paid to do so and I always take anything that I am doing that actually makes money very seriously. But I am not going to dump all kinds of information on you here … this is only a blog remember.. But I will offer you this; if you are in the construction industry in a decent sized metropolitan area and your business is not on the upswing, you should probably ask why because it should be. Economic indicators for all segments of the construction industry have been tracking upward for the past several months and all sectors are seeing steady improvement. I know there are pockets where this is not true and I know there are areas where the gains have been modest, but in general, there is solid gain in every area. Got get ‘em guys!!!
I Got It Paul – Thanks … It arrived and it is every bit as good as anticipated. And to my very pleasant surprise, he even enclosed a nice note and autographed it. I refer here, of course, to Paul Bieber and his terrific new book, 5 Minute Consultant. As you may recall, I had publicly reminded Paul that I was the very first person to buy his book (for cash no less) months before it would come out. I wanted to be the first. Paul is such a good writer that I had no doubt it would be good and it most certainly is. Now I am not totally sure how you can order one of these books for yourself but Paul can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Okay, stop reading this stuff and go order Paul’s book. This will prove to be a much better use of your time, believe me.
The Sports Thing … I feel like I am in some kind of a sports limbo or something. The baseball season has grown old and the drug thing disappointing to say the least. Football is halfway through the preseason games and these first few games mostly feature guys who are not starters and in many cases will not even make the teams they are playing for at this point. Hockey hasn’t even started to start yet, so I’m kinda bummed here. Just got the sports blahs or something. I’ll get back into this, but give me a little time please.
The Quotable Thing … If you spend any amount of time around Stumpy Darby, you will get to hear any number of incredible stories and one liners. During my gold prospecting adventure with him last week, I got to hear several and this is but one of them.
“If a man is all alone in the woods and says something but his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?”
Have A Great Week Everybody!!!